New Years.

So I’m in Dubai for New Year. Was hoping to see all my friends tomorrow night for a party for New Year. But no one was willing to have people over their house. So they have all decided they are going to have a party in the desert instead. Which means I won’t be able to go. I can’t be stuck in the desert with no way to get home if I need to which would probably end up being the case. I could take my car and drive there and back but I can’t risk getting my car stuck in the desert and not having anyone there to tow me out. All my friends are big drinkers they want to go out and get absolutely smashed and party into the wee small hours. Me? I’m happy not drinking at all, staying for 2 hours or so just to see people and then go home. Which I know is weird, but when I use to go out with all my friends back when I still lived in Dubai I felt really disconnected from them all. They’re all normal and want to do normal teenagery things like go out and get drunk. I’m not really into all that, maybe I would be if I wasn’t sick but the way I am now I just can’t do it, I don’t enjoy drinking and like to be tucked up in bed by 10/11pm sleeping, the only break I get from the pain. Though it’s safe to say I’m a little disappointed I was looking forward to seeing everyone that I haven’t seen since April, if it was at someones house instead I would have happily gone along for a bit but I don’t feel comfortable going into the desert and having to stay all night with no way of getting home when I want to. 

But to be honest I hate New Years anyway, it’s such a pointless holiday and I really don’t enjoy it at all. Last year I forced myself to stay till 12 to see the new year in which was hard because it got to 10pm and I couldn’t stand how disconnected I was feeling so I then left. So maybe it’s better that I’m not going out , at least then I can avoid the horrible disconnected feeling I always get. My sister is going to a party but my parents aren’t so I think I will just go out for a meal with them, then come home and sleep through the new year. 

On another note tomorrow it’s going to be 2 weeks till my headaches 4 year anniversary, safe to say I’m not feeling so great about it. 

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8 thoughts on “New Years.

  1. A couple of hours is definitely my limit. I don’t mind going to things at people’s houses if I know I’ll be able to rest there though. Our New Years event is a small lunch at one of our friends houses today. Luckily most of our friends seem to be over the go out and get absolutely smashed phase.

    • Yeah I’m the same and need to be able to get home when I need to and I just won’t be able to do that if I go to this desert thing. Just going to go out for dinner with my parents I think instead. Happy new year to you!

  2. I know exactly what you mean. I do the same, go somewhere for a little while, enjoy the company, then go home and let them get on. Even my husband, if he doesn’t mind to stay there alone (usually there are plenty of friends) and let me go home, he knows I feel better then. Hope you have a few good hours. And talk to you soon again,
    Marianne

    • I went out for dinner with my mum and dad which was alright then went to my friends house who was having a few people over to drink and see the new year in and stuff I didn’t drink but I managed to stay for 3 hours which is pretty good going for me. Was nice to see some old friends that I haven’t seen since April. Happy new year Marianne, I hope this year is better for you!x

  3. We went to my sister’s house. She was invited to go somewhere else, but I just couldn’t see going to someone’s house I don’t know, where I may have to sit on a hard chair and then when the pain gets bad wouldn’t have a place to lay down like at her house. Once talk began about going out I told them I wasn’t up for it, but no one wanted to leave me behind. I got so worried that I would be forced to go, that I almost had a panic attack. They finally listened and let me stay and go to bed while they went out. It took me 30 mins for my heart to quit racing and the nausea to go away. I guess what I’m trying to say is that I completely understand your hesitance to go. I’m glad you were able to see some friends at their house. Happy New Year Sian!

    • I always find it hard to explain to everyone why I’m leaving early, they’re always like “why are you leaving” and such I always say it’s cause I’m not feeling well but they just don’t really get it. I can never stay long at gatherings and parties my friends have as I just end up feeling so disconnected from them all that I can’t stand being there any longer even if the pain is okay. Happy new year to you also I hope this year is better for you!

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