Bad day.

Today is a bad pain day, I’ve had quite a few recently. Actually more than quite a few, the majority of days in the past 2 weeks have been bad. Today I got up at half 11, so pretty late but I had a busy day up in London yesterday for physio and I didn’t go to bed till pretty late last night.

When I woke the pain wasn’t too bad but since then it has just been building and building up and now I’m at an 8 on the pain scale. I feel like my brain is being crushed, it feels sharp and it’s radiating down my face, it hurts to keep my eyes open and there is nothing can do but sit with my pain. In the past this would have really got me down, I’d lie in bed in pain feeling so miserable and depressed and just wanting to die. Now I’m led in bed in pain but not feeling so miserable and depressed and I don’t want to die because there is so much I want to do, go to college, go to university, make a positive impact on someone struggling like I have struggled.

Today has been and still is a challenge to get through because the pain is so bad. It’s a challenge to think positively when I’m in so much pain. It is a challenge to keep my acceptance of my pain when it gets so bad. But this is just one bad day of hundreds that I have got through so I know without a doubt that I can get through the rest of the day and then maybe the pain won’t be quite as bad tomorrow, hopefully anyway.

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