Every time.

Every time I admit I’m doing well something happens and I end up going back downhill. Still in this flare up and it’s awful, I feel awful, I feel miserable, depressed, angry, stressed and anxious. Yes I m well aware that’s a lot of negative emotions to be feeling. I don’t know what to do and I have no one to talk to. I am unable to do any college work, my end of year graded exam for psychology is in less than a months time now, I have so much revision to do but I can’t do any of it because of the pain, so I can’t see myself passing the exam. I have my final graded law assignment due in 2 weeks, I am yet to start it because of the pain and I am feeling stressed about it. I feel like giving up with it all at the minute.

I don’t know what to do, the problem is the pain and that can’t be fixed or helped, who knows how long I will be in flare up, the last one lasted a month. I don’t know how to do everything I need to do when I’m in so much pain. I can’t even keep up with my pain management techniques, I don’t know how to do it all.

At the minute I just feel like crying, I have spent the day on the sofa watching tv with my dog, that’s exactly what I did yesterday as well, oh and the day before also. My depression is creeping back in and I have no one to talk to about it all and I just don’t know what to do.


6 thoughts on “Every time.

  1. Hello Sian! I’m sorry you are experiencing a difficult time with your flare up. I hope it passes soon and you are able to get your school work done. Your blog posts really help me as I am a fellow chronic headache sufferer myself. I like to read your posts because it lets me know I am not alone. I have had my headache for 3 and a half years with no relief. I’ve tried everything possible (conventional and alternative medicine) and I still have no relief. It’s so frustrating to go about everyday life with this constant pain. I feel like I am cursed. But, again thank you for writing about your experiences. It’s very helpful. I wish I had a magic wand to make our headaches magically disappear. 🙂

    • Hi Nik! So sorry you suffer from a chronic headache too. But I’m so glad you found my blog and reading my posts help you feel less alone. I too often feel like I am cursed and wish for a magic wand to take away our pain.
      I wish you a low pain day, hang in there 🙂

      • Hi Nik,

        Thanks to replying to my comment. I made a new friend. By the way, have you tried trigger point injections? That’s what my neuro suggested next.

  2. Totally feeling your pain right now. I was doing well, and today has been a setback. But I fall monumentally harder after a good streak. It hurts so much more after feeling good for a while. Blah. All we can do is hang in there. Cheers!

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